On the pursuit of contentment, not happiness

After the storms of talking through, and doing hard things, comes the most wonderful moments of peace and clarity. This is the reward, if you like, of facing big feelings and growing individually and as a couple.

Happiness is an emotion like any other. It is often fleeting or at least temporary. In many ways the self help books that encourage you to search for happiness, have it wrong. It’s more about creating contentment. This feeling, contentment, contains a spectrum of positive emotions like happiness, joy, peace, comfort, relaxation and feelings of wanting to share and give to others.

For me, this is the goal of working and doing hard things, both individually and in a marriage or partnership. The idea is that the human experience of contentment can be built and expanded by dealing with the things that bring discontentment.

It’s a simple idea, but I don’t think it is a small one.

How do you bring contentment into your life?